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In
three short months, twenty-four year old Marshall Bruce Mathers
III has gone from white trash to white hot.
The
Michigan rapper who calls himself Eminem - and whose debut The
Slim Shady LP, sold 480,000 copies in its first two weeks -
was a $5.50-an-hour cook in a Detroit grill before his obscenity-strewn,
gleefully violent, spastic, hilarious and demented rhymes landed
him in the studio with rap honcho Dr. Dre.
The
blue-eyed MC is dealing with the instant fame and simultaneous criticism
well enough -- much better, actually, than he is dealing with the
fifth of Bicardi he downed an hour ago. On a chilly Friday night
in New York, he emerges bleary-eyed from the bathroom in his manager's
office. "I just threw up everything I had," he says in his slow-roll
drawl, which is a bit slower at the moment. "All I ate today was
that slice of pizza. Feel good now, though."
His
manager exhales slowly with relief. Eminem has three club gigs tonight,
and the first one starts in less than an hour. The crew (nine, including
DJ Stretch Armstrong and Dennis the security guard) ambles toward
the elevator. Downstairs awaits Eminem's partner in rap, Royce the
5'9, who looks to be about that and has seven people of his own
in tow. Em hops into a gigantic ant white limo as fellow honky Armstrong
cops a rhyme from Eric Clapton's Cream. "In the white room, with
white people and white rappers," he bellows. A minute later there's
a knock on the window and one of Royce's posse gives Em the first
of the three hits of ecstasy he will consume over the course of
the night. Down it goes in a swallow of ginger ale as the car zooms
off towards Staten Island.
Out
on New Dorp Lane, there is a crowd of kids, a mere fraction of the
number already inside the Lane Theater. The all-ages show is packed,
and Eminem is the evening's main course. The mob is being controlled
by the club's security, but when the rapper moves inside, the burly
dudes are no match for the crush of shouting teens. "You look good!"
one girl shouts. "Oh, my God, he looks even better in person," shrieks
another. Everywhere, kids have tiny glow sticks in their mouths,
which, here in the dark, look like neon braces. At the back of the
club, up a ladder, is the minute-dressing room, where the very proud
owner of the club is waiting. "Hey, nice to meet ya," he says. "My
daughter told me to get Eminem, so I got Eminem. It's her fourteenth
birthday. Hey, say hi to her and her friends."
Eminem
soon grabs four bottles of water and heads to the stage. He owns
this audience. These predominantly white kids know every word, every
nuance, and can't get enough. If Slim Shady's rhymes about sex with
underage girls ("Yo look at her bush, does it got hair?/Fuck this
bitch right on the spot bare/Till she passes out and she forgot
how she got there") bother them any, they don't show it. In fact,
the filthier the material, the louder the cheers.
On
The Slim Shady LP, Eminem says "God sent me to piss the world
off." Interscope Records is Em's label - a perfect fit for a company
that's home to controversial artists like the late Tupac Shakur
and Marilyn Manson. Eminem has been condemned as a misogynist, a
nihilist and an advocate of domestic violence, principally in an
editorial by Billboard editor in chief Timothy White, who attacked
The Slim Shady LP as "making money by exploiting the world's
misery." "My album isn't for younger kids to hear," Eminem says.
"It has an advisory sticker, and you must be eighteen to get it.
That doesn't mean younger kids won't get it, but I'm not responsible
for every kid out there. I'm not a role model, and I don't claim
to be." On the album, his alias, Slim Shady, hangs himself from
a tree by his penis, dumps the girlfriend he's murdered in a lake
with the help of their baby daughter, takes every drug at once,
rips "Pamela Lee's tits off" and heads out into the night yelling,
"Too all the people I've offended, yeah fuck you too!"
This
hard-core attitude has won him acceptance not just from teenagers
taken with his video but also from the hip hop community. Later
on, at Manhattan's Sound Factory, Em will win over a mostly black
audience. He will be greeted with indifferent stares that will melt
into smiles, then rump-shaking abandon by the end of his four-song
set. The rapper will top of the evening - well, the morning by that
point - entertaining doelike women and spiky-haired guys at the
trendy mecca called Life, where a table of model types will be evicted
so that Em and his friends may kick back.
Right
about now, though, a roomful of Staten Islanders is going berserk.
In the silence between songs, a young girl in the front row who's
wearing a white baby T screams, "I love you!" Eminem walks over.
"I love you, too," he says and bends down to give her a hug. Big
mistake. The girl lays a kiss on his lips and sets off the girl
next to her, who tears Eminem's head away and kisses him full on
the mouth. "Oh shit," he laughs. "I'm going to jail tonight!" He
launches into "Scary Movies," the B side to the independently released
"Bad Meets Evil" single, and the audience raps right along. When
he sits at the front of the stage, his pants are pulled at and his
crotch is grabbed. "I touched his dick!" on girl boasts to her friend.
Eminem
is already a bona fide star, the type not-likely to play a club
this small again. The only reason he is here at all is that this
date was booked before his debut album entered the charts at Number
Two. The demand for the record at stores around the country was
so great the Interscope shipped more that 1 million copies - extraordinarily
rare for a first record. Eminem has similarily conquered MTV: Since
the January release of the wise-ass video for "My Name Is" he has
been on the network more than Carson Daly. And now three months
later, despite the fact that he's never headlined for any length
of time, the rapper has been offered slots on every summer tour
except CSNY's.
Eminem
empties a water bottle on the heads of the audience, drops his pants,
waves his middle finger around, and the show is over. He is whisked
into a waiting car through a back alley. The police have been called
to keep things orderly as the limo moves of into the night. At the
curb, a girl who looks no more that fourteen shouts, "I want to
fuck you," tugging suggestively at the top of her shirt and revealing
her pierced tongue. "I want to fuck you, too," Eminem says aloud
to himself. "But I won't."
Eminem
is a white boy in a black medium. He has been booed on the mic and
told repeatedly by black hip-hoppers that he should stop rapping
and go into rock & roll. "It's some very awkward shit," says
Em's mentor, Dr. Dre, about the race card. "It's like seeing a black
guy doing country & western, know what I'm saying?" Even Dre's
judgement was suspect when he signed Em to his Interscope imprint,
Aftermath. "I got a couple of questions from people around me,"
he says. "You know, 'He's got blue eyes, he's a white kid.' But
I don't give a fuck if you're purple: If you can kick it, I'm working
with you." Indeed, talent will overcome, and Em is having the last
laugh. "A lot of the people who disrespected me are coming out of
the woodwork now for collaborations," he says. "But I like doing
my own shit. If there were too many other voices, the stories wouldn't
go right." True enough - slipping a verse into a song about a New
Wave blonde babe nurse's aide who overdoses on mushrooms and relieves
her father's sexual abuse, all over a party-hearty tempo, isn't
exactly the same as freestyling on the "Money, Cash, Hoes" remix.
For
anyone expecting more of the naughty pop-culture-obsessed blonde
kid in the clean version of "My Name Is", proffered on MTV, The
Slim Shady LP is some bad-trip nether world. But that world
is exactly why the hip-hop underground loves Em. His off-the-beat
flow, way off-the-beat lyrics and loony-tunes presentation place
him in a class by himself. Em isn't trying to be Jay-Z, DMX, or
Tupac; he's trying to be the Roadrunner, turning his enemies' anvils
back on themselves with split-second trickery. He's also probably
the only MC in 1999 who boasts low self-esteem. His rhymes are jaw-droppingly
perverse, bespeaking a minimum-wage life devoid of hope, flushed
with rage and weaned on sci-fi slasher flicks.
And
in the midst of the splatter is Marshall Mathers. Songs like "As
The World Turns", in which Shady "fucks a divorced slut" to death
with his "go-go-gadget dick," are adolescent fantasies that indicate
how Em spells revenge. But songs like "If I Had" and "Rock Bottom"
are where the cartoons fade away, the bravado drops and the frustrated
kid of this not-too-distant past appears, fed up with life, dead-end
jobs adn the poverty that has made him "mad enough to scream but
sad enough to tear."
"I
couldn't even got into a motherfucking club just being Eminem, before
the video," Mathers says, walking through Newark Airport the day
after his New York club shows. "Last night they had people clearing
tables for me. It's fucking bananas. Scary shit too, 'cause you
can fall just as quick as you went to the top." He is a smallish
guy who walks with a subdued swagger. Em is like a class clown with
a lot on his mind: When he's on, nothing escapes the cross hairs
of his snottiness, but when he's off, no one is included in his
thoughts. He keeps the world at bay with humor and an ever-growing
list of character voices, including a roguish Scotsman, a Middle
Eastern cab driver, and a sleazy lech. He slips into these voices
constantly, even in the midst of heart-wrenching stories about his
childhood. Today he is chipper and apparently no worse for wear
after just two hours of sleep and no breakfast. He is bound for
his home-town of Detroit for three days off before heading to Mexico
to perform on MTV's Spring Break '99, then on to Chicago for more
album promotion.
The
rapper is no stranger to moving around. He and his mother shuttled
between Missouri and Michigan, rarely staying in one house for more
than a year or two, and finally settled down when Marshall was eleven.
It was the start of a life full of enough screaming fights and sordid
dramas that, at the tender age of 24, Eminem is ready for his own
Behind The Music. But what happened depends on whom you ask.
To hear him tell it, his life up until now has been non-stop hard
knocks, beatings from bullies, and brawls with his pill-popping,
lawsuit-happy mom. His mother, Debbie Mathers-Briggs, on the other
hand, denies both of these characterizations, claiming that her
unending love and financial support got Eminem through the dog days.
It's a story that would make Jerry Spring salivate, but let's just
stick to the facts: (1) Eminem has never met his father; (2) he
spent his formative years living in a largely black lower-middle-class
Detroit neighborhood; (3) he dropped out of high school in the ninth
grade; (4) he and his baby's mother have been breaking up and making
up for the past eight years, and; (5) he loves their three-year-old
daughter Hailie Jade, more than anybody else in the world.
Eminem's
parents were married, his mother says, when she was fifteen and
his father was twenty-two. Marshall III was born two years later.
His parents were in a band called Daddy Warbucks, playing Ramada
Inns along the Dakota-Montana border. But their relationship when
sour. The couple split up, and Debbie and her son lived with family
members for a few years before settling on the east side of Detroit.
Marshall's father moved to California. As a teen, the future Eminem
sent his dad a few letters, all of which, his mother claims, came
back "return to sender". "I heard he's trying to get in touch with
me now," the rapper says. "Fuck that motherfucker, man. Fuck him."
The
single mother and her sons (Em's younger half-brother, Nathan, was
born in 1986) were one of three white households on their block.
"I'm colorblind - it wasn't an issue," Em's mom says. "But the younger
people in the area gave us trouble. Marshall got jumped a lot."
When he was sixteen, his ass was kicked fiercely. "I was walking
home from my boy's house, through the Bel-Air Shopping Center,"
he recalls. "All these black dudes rode by in a car, flippin' me
off. I flipped them off back, they drove away, and I didn't think
nothin' of it." Evidently they parked the car. "One dude came up,
hit me in the face and knocked me down. Then he pulled out a gun.
I ran right out my shoes, dog. I thought that's what they wanted."
But they didn't - when Mathers returned the next day, his shoes
were still stuck in the mud. "That's how I knew it was racial."
Em was saved by a white guy who pulled over, took out a gun and
drove him home. "He came in wearing just his socks and underwear,"
his mother says woefully. "They had taken his jogging suit off him,
taken his boombox. They would have taken him out, too."
Eminem
heard his first rap song when he was nine years old. It was "Reckless"
a track featuring Ice-T on the Breakin' soundtrack, which his Uncle
Ronnie had given him. Ten years later, when Ronnie committed suicide,
Eminem was devasted. "I didn't talk for days," he says. "I couldn't
even go to the funeral."
He
dropped out of high school after failing the ninth grade for the
third time. "As soon as I turned fifteen," he says, "my mother was
like, 'Get a fucking job and help me with these bills or your ass
is out.' Then she would fucking kick me out anyway, half the time
right after she took most of my paycheck." His mom says none of
this is true: "A friend told me, 'Debbie, he's saying this stuff
for publicity.' He was always well provided for." Either way, his
salvation was rap and the rhymes he had begun to write. "As soon
as my mom would leave to go play bingo, I would blast the stereo,"
he says. Soon enough he was ready to test his skills by sneaking
into neighboring Osborne High School with his friend and fellow
MC Proof, for lunchroom rap throw-downs. "It was like White Men
Can't Jump," says Proof, now an account executive for hip hop
clothier Maurice Malone. "Everybody thought he'd be easy to beat,
and they got smoked every time."
On
Saturdays the two friends went to open-mic contests at the Hip-Hop
Shop, on West 7 Mile, ground zero for the Detroit scene. "As soon
as I'd grab the mic, I'd get booed," Eminem recalls. "Once motherfuckers
heard me rhyme, though, they'd shut up." With four other rappers,
Em and Proof formed a crew called the Dirty Dozen before Em released
his own album, Infinite, on a local label in 1996 - an effort
devoid of Shady's wacked out humor and pent-up rage. "It was right
before my daughter was born, so having a future for her was all
I talked about," he says. "It was way hip-hopped out, like Nas or
AZ - that rhyme style was real in at the time. I've always been
a smartass comedian, and that's why it wasn't a good album."
Detroit
DJs and radio folks seemed to agree, leaving Infinite well
enough alone. "After that record, every rhyme I wrote got angrier
and agrier," Eminem says. "A lot of it was because of the feedback
I got. Motherfuckers was like, "You're a white boy, what the fuck
are you rapping for? Why don't you go into rock and roll? All that
type of shit started pissing me off." It didn't help that days before
his daughter's first birthday, Eminem got fired from his cooking
job at Gilbert's Lodge. "That was the worst time ever, dog," he
says. "It was like five days before Christmas, which is Hailie's
birthday. I had, like, forty dollars to get her something. I wrote
"Rock Bottom" write after that."
This
downward spiral ended one day on the john when Em met Slim Shady.
"Boom, the name hit me, and right away I thought of all these words
to rhyme with it," he says. "So I wiped my ass, got up off the pot
and, ah, went and called everybody I knew."
Shady
became Em's vengeful gremlin, his knight in smarmy armor, and Inspector
Gadget Incredible Hulk with a taste for a bit of the ultra-violence.
It was high time for Em to write some of the wrongs in his life,
and Slim Shady was just the cat to right them. At the top of the
shit list was his grade-school nemesis, D'Angelo Bailey. Yes, the
bully who gets it with a broomstick in "Brain Damage" was entirely
real. "Motherfucker used to beat the shit out of me," Eminem says.
"I was in fourth grade and he was in sixth. Everything in the song
is true: One day he came in the bathroom, I was pissing, and he
beat the shit out of me. Pissed all over myself. But that's not
how I got really fucked up." During recess one winter, Em taunted
a smallish friend of Bailey's. "D'Angelo Bailey - no one called
him D'Angelo - came running from across the yard and hit me so hard
into this snowbank that I blacked out." Em was sent hom, his ear
started bleeding, and he was taken to the hospital. "He had cerebral
hemorrhage and was in and out of consciousness for five days," his
mother reports. "The doctors had given up on him, but I wouldn't
give up on my son."
"I
remember waking up and saying, 'I can spell elephant,'" Em
recalls with a laugh. "D'Angelo Bailey - I'll never forget that
kid."
Old
D'Angelo won't forget you, either. "He was the one we used to pick
on," says Bailey, now married with kids and living in Detroit. "There
was a bunch of us that used to mess with him. You know, bully-type
things. We was having fun. Sometimes he'd fight back - depended
on what mood he'd be in." As for Eminem's recollection of the event
that put him in the hospital, Bailey boasts, "Yeah, we flipped him
right on his head at recess. When we didn't see him moving, we took
off running. We lied and said he slipped on the ice. He was a wild
kid, but back then we thought it was stupid. Hey, you have his phone
number?"
In
the spring of 1997, Eminem recorded his eight song Slim Shady
EP - the demo that earned him his deal with Interscope. At the
time, he was scrounging more than ever. He and his girlfriend, Kim,
had been living with their baby in crack-infested neighborhoods.
A stray bullet flying through the kitchen window and lodging in
the wall while Kim was doing dishes wasn't the worst of it - they
had been adopted by a crackhead. "The neighborhoods we lived in
fucking sucked," Kim says. "I went through four TVs and five VCRs
in two years." After cleaning out the first of those TVs and VCRs,
plus a clock radio, the guy came back one night to make a sandwich.
"He left the peanut butter, jelly - all the shit - out and didn't
steal nothing," Em says. "Ain't this about a motherfucking bitch.
But then he came back again and took everything but the couches
and beds. The pillows, clothes, silverware - everything. We were
fuckin' fucked."
The
young parents moved in with Em's mother for a while, which wasn't
much better. "My mother did a lot of dope and shit - a lot of pills
- so she had mood swings," Em says. "She'd go to bed cool, then
wake up like, 'Motherfuckers, get out!'" Em's mom denies all of
the above. "I've never done drugs," she says. "Marshall was raised
in a drug and alcohol-free enviroment." He moved in with friends,
and Kim and the baby lived with her mother. "I didn't have a job
that whole summer," Em recalls. "Then we got evicted, because my
friends and me were paying rent to the guy on the lease, and he
screwed us over." The night before he headed to the Rap Olympics,
an annual nationwide MC battle in L.A., he came home to a locked
door and an eviction notice. "I had to break in," he says. "I didn't
have anywhere else to go. There was no heat, no water, no electricity.
I slept on the floor, woke up, went to L.A. I was so pissed."
"Oh,
my God," recalls Paul "Bunyan" Rosenberg, the beefy lawyer who manages
Eminem. "There was this black guy sitting next to me in the crowd
at the Olympics. After the first round, he yells, 'Just give it
to the white boy. It's over. Give it to the white boy.'"
They
didn't, and Em was crushed. Not only couldhe have used the first-place
prize, 500 bucks and a Rolex, but he wasn't used to taking second.
"He really looked like he was going to cry," Rosenberg says, nodding
thoughtfully. Well, Eminem lost the battle, but he won the war.
A Shady EP given to a few Interscope staffers soon made it
into the hands of co-head Jimmy Iovine. While Em was in L.A., Iovine
and Dr. Dre took a listen. "In my entire career in the music industry,"
Dre says, "I have never found anything from a demo tape of a CD.
When Jimmy played this, I said, 'Find him. Now.'"
Their
first day in the studio, the pair knocked off "My Name Is" in about
an hour, and as much as that song proved that Em is a brother from
another planet, they were just warming up. "I wrote two songs for
the next album on ecstasy," Eminem says. "Shit about bouncing off
walls, going straight through 'em, falling down twenty stories.
Crazy. That's what we do when I'm in the studio with Dre." Dr. Dre
on E? "Ha, ha," Dre laughs. "He didn't say that! It's true, though.
We get in there, get bugged out, stay in the studio for fuckin'
two days. Then you're dead for three days. Then you wake up, pop
the tape in, like, 'Let me see what I've done.'"
"Hey,
turn here," Eminem says to the driver of the big white van currently
crunching through the snow-covered streets of east Detroit. "Stop.
That was our house. My room was upstairs, in the back." The small
two-story homes on the gridlike streets are identical - square patch
of grass in the front, a short driveway on the side - differentiable
only by their brick face or shingles. The van turns off 8 Mile,
passing Em's high school, then the field next to the Bel-Air Shopping
Center, where Em lost his boombox and nearly his life. Em is looking
out of the window like a kid at Disneyland, pointing, recalling
happy and heartbreaking memories with equal excitement. "I like
living in Detroit, making it my home," he says as the van heads
toward the highway. "I like working out in L.A., but I wouldn't
want to live there. My little girl is here."
The
van pulls up to Gilbert's Lodge, the every-food family restaurant
in suburban St. Clair Shores where Em worked on and off for three
years. Inside there are antler chandeliers, a couple of appetite-suppressing
mounted moose heads and a "trophy room," containing the jerseys
of various local teams. The restaurant's staff scurries about, unaware
of Em, who has virtually walked into the kitchen without being greeted.
"Yo, Pete, whassup?" Em calls to a mustached man checking on orders.
"Hi, Marshall," answers his former manager, Pete Karagiaouris. "Coming
in to buy the place?" A few heads turn, and apron-clad folks say
quick hellos.
"Hi,
Marshall," says a forties-ish waitress with a sticky-sweet voice
and a Midwestern accent. "You know, I watch MTV and I never see
you."
"Oh,
yeah?" he replies coolly.
Em
takes a table towards the back. After a very silent twenty minutes,
he stops a passing waitress: "Can we get some beers here?"
"Yeah,
but I need to see your ID," she says.
"I
don't have my wallet with me, but I used to work here - ask Pete.
I'm over twenty-one."
Less
than twenty-four hours ago, in Staten Island, security guards had
kept a frothing crowd from tearing Em to shreds while he earned
five grand for rapping four songs. In his own hometown, in the place
he spent forty to sixty hours a week for three years, he's a stranger,
and one without silverware, water or a menu. Either Gilbert's issued
a memo about keeping Em real or the staff is having trouble coming
to terms with Marshall's success. "Why did that bitch have to say
that?" he says about the MTV jab. "Fucking bitch. I never liked
her." It's a theme he returns to for the rest of the night. Em's
shot of Bacardi arrives; he slams it, gets another and goes off
to talk to the Gilbert's former co-workers. "Man, everything can
be going so right," Rosenberg says, sipping his beer. "But a comment
like that will stick with him for days. This is his reality - he
came from this, and after everything is over, this is the reality
he has to go back to."
The
manager heads over, offering to make Eminem a special garlic-chicken
pizza. "He was a good worker," Karagiaouris recalls. "But he'd be
in the back rapping all the orders, and sometimes I had to tell
him to tone it down." Em demonstrates, freestyling the ingredients
of most of the appetizers in his herky-jerky whine. "Music was always
the most important thing to him," Karagiaouris says. "But I never
knew if he was any good at it - I listen to Greek music."
"You
know what, Paulie?" Em says, smiling mischeviously. "I want to do
a clothing line. Fat Fuck Clothing, for the Big Pun in you. What
do you think?"
It's
getting late, and Em's daughter is waiting for him. He has four
days here at home to spend with her and her mother.
The
van winds back to Detroit, stopping at a modest home. Kim, a pretty
blonde, hops in holding Hailie, a groggy but smiley blue-eyed beauty
who immediately dives onto Em's lap and wraps her arms around his
neck. The van whisks off, Hailie falls back to sleep, and Em tells
Kim about the New York shows. Forty minutes later, the van turns
into the trailer park - more of a village, really - that Em calls
home. "After I got my record deal, my mother moved back to Kansas
City," he says. "I took over the payments on her trailer, but I'm
never here." Indeed, the eviction notice on the door is proof enough.
"Don't worry, we took care of that one," Rosenberg says as Em rips
it off and goes inside.
The
double-wide mobile home houses Em's possessions, which, after all
the robberies and the moving around, have been acquired in the last
six months. An autographed glossy of Dre that reads, "Thanks for
the support, asshole" (mirroring Shady's autograph in "My Name Is")
is on the wall, as is the album art from the Shady EP. Above
the TV are two shots of Em and Dre from the video shoot, along with
pictures of Hailie. A small rack holds CDs by 2Pac, Mase, Babyface,
Luther Vandross, Esthero and Snoop Dogg. A baby couch for Hailie
sits in front of the TV. On a wall near the kitchen is a flyer titled
"Commitments for Parents," which lists directives like "I will give
my child space to grow, dream, succeed and sometimes fail."
Hailie
settles down on the floor with a stuffed polar bear as Kim prepares
her for bed. The couple are happy to see each other tonight, but
songs like "'97 Bonnie and Clyde" make it clear that times are not
always this tranquil. Their relationship has been volatile - all
the more so since their daughter's birth. At one point two years
ago, when they were on the outs and dating other people, Kim, according
to Eminem, made it difficult for him to see his daughter and even
threatenend to file a restraining order. Em wrote "Just the Two
of Us" on the Shady EP, to tell the tale of a father killing
his baby's mother and cleaning up the mess with the help of his
daughter: "Here, you wanna help Dada tie a rope around this rock?/Then
we'll tie it to her footsie, then we'll roll her off the dock/Here
we go, count of three. One, two, three, wee!/There goes Mama, splashing
in the water/No more fighting with Dad, no more restraining order."
The
original had a slightly different beat and a less monied production
that "'97 Bonnie and Clyde," the version on the Interscope album,
but on the Shady LP, Hailie chillingly plays herself (she
is also on the album cover and liner notes). "I lied to Kim and
told her I was taking her to Chuck E. Cheese that day," Em recalls.
"But I took her to the studio. When she found out I used our daughter
to write a song about killer her, she fucking blew. We had just
got back together for a couple of weeks. Then I played her the song,
and she bugged the fuck out."
Kim
declines to comment on that song or any of the others about her,
including a track slated for Em's next album called "Kim." The song
is the prelude to "'97 Bonnie and Clyde," with Em acting out the
screaming fight that ends in murder. Em has played it for her already
and claims that now she is truly convinced that he is insane. "If
I was her, I would have ran when I heard that shit," Dre says. "It's
over the top - the whole song is him screaming. It's good, though.
Kim gives him a concept."
Em's
friend Proof has been around the couple from the beginning. "This
is what I love about Em," he says. "One time we came home and Kim
had thrown all his clothes on the lawn - which was, like, two pairs
of pants and some gym shoes. So we stayed at my grandmother's, and
Em's like 'I'm leaving her; I'm never going back.' Next day, he's
back with her. The love they got is so genuine, it's ridiculous.
He gonna end up marrying her. But there's always gonna be conflict
there."
Em
says Hailie has heard his record and loves it, but he knows she's
too young still to get much more than the beats. "When she gets
old enough, I'm going to explain it to her," Em says. "I'll let
her know that Mommy and Daddy weren't getting along at the time.
None of it was to be taken literally." He shakes his head ruefully.
"Although at the time, I wanted to fucking do it." Em is the first
to admit that he's got a bad temper, which he has harnessed into
a career. "My thoughts are so fucking evil when I'm writing shit,"
he says. "If I'm mad at my girl, I'm gonna sit down and write the
most misogynistic fucking rhyme in the world. It's not how I feel
in general, it's how I feel at that moment. Like say today, earlier,
I might think something like, 'Coming through the airport sluggish,
walking on crutches, hit a pregnant bitch in the stomach with luggage.'"
Slim
Shady is Marshall Mathers' way of taking revenge on the world, and
he's also a defense mechanism. On the one hand, a lot of Slim Shady's
cartoonish fantasies are offensive; on the other, they're better
than Mathers re-creating the kind of abuse the world heaped upon
him growing up. "I dealt with a lot of shit coming up, a lot of
shit," he says. "When it's like that, you learn to live day by day.
When all this happened, I took a deep breath, just like, "I did
it.'" The magnitude of what he's done in such a short time doesn't
seem to have sunk in. Em hasn't sipped the bubbly or smelled the
roses - and if he allots time for that in the next few months, it
will have to be at the drive-through. As for the future, he won't
even wager a guess.
"If
he remains the same person that walked into the studio with me that
first day, he will be fucking larger than Michael Jackson," says
a confident Dre. "There are a lot of ifs and buts, but my man, he's
dope and very humble." As Em closes the door, with Hailie's blanket
in his hands, he looks humble, a little tired and pretty happy.
For now
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